The Spring Festival falls on the 1st day of the 1st lunar month, usually about a month or so later than the Gregorian calendar. It originated in the Shang Dynasty (c. 1600 BC-c. 1100 BC) from the people’s sacrifice to gods and ancestors at the end of an old year and the beginning of a new one. This is the most important holiday and part of the year for Chinese and is very similar to Christmas in the west. Since Shenzhen is a city made of immigrants from all over China, the city experiences a mass exodus starting about a week before New Year’s Day.
We joined that exodus after work on Friday, Feb 16 when we flew to Chengdu. Early Saturday morning we traveled to Pei Lin’s hometown to spend the first few days of the festival with his family. This time I didn’t experience any of the anxiousness or being nervous I felt in December when I made the trip for the first time. Just pure excitement about experiencing my first traditional spring festival in China.
Like many family gatherings in the US over our traditional holiday period between Thanksgiving and Christmas, the days were full of visiting with relatives and friends, gossiping and catching up, playing games, watching tv and just spending quality time with loved ones.
The dinner on New Year’s Eve is when all family members eat dinner together. The meal is usually more elaborate than usual. Dishes such as chicken, fish and bean curd are prominent because in Chinese, their pronunciations, respectively “ji“, “yu” and “doufu,” mean auspiciousness, abundance and richness. There were about 20 or so people for dinner at Pei Lin’s parents, some of whom I met in December and others for the first time. I understood a little of what was being discussed, but not everything as I would find out later.
Later that night, Pei Lin told me that over dinner his father, much to Pei Lin’s embarrassment and thankfully my “deafness”, explained to everyone that we were such good friends that during our last visit we slept together in a small twin bed. Before we arrived this time his parents had offered to buy a bigger bed for us so we could sleep together. But we had decided it would be a waste of money since it would only be used when we visited and that would only be a few time a year. So this time we were also sleeping very close together. Pei Lin was too shocked at his father’s sharing of our sleeping arrangements that he didn’t recall everyone’s reaction. I am just glad that I didn’t understand what was being discussed!
As midnight and the new year approached people were out on the streets setting off fireworks of all sizes and loudness and the neighbors began laying out these 10, 20, 50 and 100 foot rolls of firecrackers that stretched from their front doors out to the middle of the street. I could see what was coming but actually standing in the middle of it was as close to war as I hope I ever come. The sound was deafening and the smoke so thick you could almost touch it. This lasted for a good 15 or 20 minutes. I took some video of the firecrackers but when replayed later couldn’t see anything and could only hear the tens of thousands of firecrackers going off. It was incredible and since I am a big kid was just loving it.
There is actually a purpose in the firecrackers, it is thought the spluttering sound could help drive away evil spirits, which are meant to bid farewell to the old year and usher in the new. Apparently new year’s eve is only bidding farewell to the old because early new year’s day the fireworks started again which must have been ushering in the new. Since most big cities have banned fireworks ,the beautiful red firecracker handicrafts that are for sale in the days leading up to the new year have become a popular way to signify driving the evil spirits away.
We spent the next two days visiting with some of Pei Lin’s cousins and primary school classmates. A good part of the day was spent playing games, mostly cards. We brought the card game Uno with us and taught the neighborhood how to play; played various Chinese card games, the one where I promptly lost 5 dollars I thought it best to watch; and we modified the card game “spoons” to reflect the local culture by using chopsticks, which was a huge hit with kids of all ages.
There were so many new experiences, realizations of what certain symbols and customs mean, meeting new friends and family members and expressions of kindness that made the trip great. But my favorite memory is when Pei Lin told me that it seemed like we had gotten married because we were going everywhere as a couple to meet this friend, or that cousin, or that uncle. While being gay is not easy in any country, it is undoubtedly harder culturally in China then in the US to come out and live an openly gay life. People aren’t stupid and while we didn’t come out by saying specific words, I was accepted as a son, a brother and Pei Lin’s partner last week and it was an incredible experience.
Before we wanted to go it was time to leave. After my first visit in December, I thought 4 days in Pingtan over the Spring Festival would give me the chance to experience a real, traditional Chinese Spring Festival celebration and not be “too much” for me. Well it was too much of a good time and my only regret was I didn’t think I would be able to or comfortable enough to spend a week in a traditional setting. Not sure how or when but I would love to spend a month in Pingtan helping Pei Lin’s dad run his video rental store and experience normal daily life.
